The Boring Conference–the only must-attend conference of 2016 confirms speakers (though logically the list may change if speakers pull out for any reason which does sometimes happen)
The Boring Conference, scheduled to take place at Conway Hall at 10am in central London this Saturday, will feature talks on East German pedestrian crossing signals, paper bags, lamp posts, Toilet roll quality control codes, small words and bricks. There will be other talks but in the interests of concision a decision has been taken to abbreviate the list of talks at this point because to add further detail would give the game away and might cause the reader to lose interest. Furthermore, adding extra details of talks might make the attendee who has paid good money to come to the event feel that the surprise factor has been diminished somewhat, a phenomenon youngsters refer to as a spoiler, which in turn might create a bit of an atmosphere at the event. 
James Ward, organiser, said: “I am pleased that we are once again hosting this event at Conway Hall in central London. It is, of course, the 22nd anniversary of the recovery of Edvard Munch’s iconic painting The Scream undamaged after being stolen from the National Gallery of Norway. My assistant said to me while were stapling the agendas together that she thought it might be quite a nice idea to pay homage. Quick as a flash I suggested that we invite the audience to imitate the scream from their seats. ‘Yes, let’s see how long that lasts’, she replied encouragingly.”
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