‘Spats, I fear will never return. Unless someone stands up for what is right ‘
And I, it seems, must be that man. If we are to see the Bluewater shopping centre and the local skate park once more overrun with bespatted males then I must stand up and be counted.
Immediately the thorny issue of spats stockists rears its head. Spats are no longer available on every high street from a respectable Gentleman’s outfitters. Indeed, often I have promenaded down a provincial high street and been saddened and appalled that there is nothing that even resembles a quality haberdashers. Outside of London Town, where the populace purchase their requisites is a mystery.
A younger colleague assures me that what is required is a facebook group. I do not know what this means. He however has ‘set one up’ and tells me that if I merely invite you to visit flaneur.me.uk/spats you will be directed straight to the group. Isn’t technology odd? When our Bring Back Spats group reaches 100,000 members the larger menswear emporia will have to bow to demand. So far we have one member. I would join, but I don’t have a computer. But, at least I wear spats! Does it matter if you have the latest ephone or MP5 player? NO! But to be spatless is to sink to the level of our farmyard friends. Do you ever see a sheep in spats? No! Together we can change the world. Bring back Spats!
Next time – why has the top hat fallen out of vogue?
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